Self discovery: Get started with self-reflection

Hi, welcome to the first day of The Leads Intellectual challenge: a 30-day Intellectual challenge with Fatai Kareem. If you would like to know about Fatai Kareem, check this post

Today, he will be discussing self discovery: how you can get started with self reflection. Are you finding it difficult to live a fulfilled life? Do you find it hard to make a balance between your work, family and personal life? Is managing people to achieve the business goal a problem? Is your organisation going through the hard time? You are bothered about what could be the cause?

Well, Having a better understanding of self discovery will help you to find solution to your challenge. What is self discovery?

Self discovery is a conscious exploration of inner self with the aim of knowing who you are, your values, personality, potential, beliefs, preference, emotions, feeling, tendency, needs, and how all these impact your life, decisions and actions. It is a process of observing, questioning and examining your own thoughts, words, feelings and actions in order to reach your own conclusion regarding who you truly are.

Self discovery begins with self-reflection, which involves making time for yourself to look deeply into yourself to see those inner things and external forces that are shaping your life. Then, taking an inventory or journal of your feeling, thought, actions and reactions. This can be done daily, weekly or monthly. And it requires mindfulness, honesty and discipline.

How can you get started?

To begin the your journey of discovering who you truly are, get your pen and note and practise these 40 self-reflection exercises with mindfulness, honesty and discipline:

1. Who am I?

2. What is my purpose in life?

3. What are my top three values? How I am living in ways different from these values?

4. What is my special gift?

5. What brings me joy most?

6. What matters to me most?

7. What scares me most?

8. What are my top needs and desires? Are they fulfilled by my present life?

9. What is my biggest challenge? What am I doing to overcome it?

10. What gets me motivated, inspired and excited?

11. What would I like to do more? Why?

12. What would I like to do less? Why?

13. How do I define success and measure my success?

14. Do I find myself feeling envious of my peers or colleagues? Why?

15. What are three words that describe me best?

16. How much do I value my physical health? Do I make time for it?

17. How much do I value my mental health? Do I make time for it?

18 How much do I value my social life? Do I make time for it?

19. Do I feel seen, heard and valued?

20. Do I feel loved or rejected? Why?

21. What makes me feel like myself? Why?

22. If I could change one thing in my life, what would that thing be? Why?

23. What do I need to do to have more peace in my life? 

24. What are the principles guiding my life?

25 Do I consider my study or work to be purposeful?

26. If I didn't get paid, would I still enjoy my job?

27. Do I feel comfortable standing up for myself at home, work or everywhere?

28. What is draining my energy? How can I leave it or protect myself from its negative impact?

29. How well do I maintain my calmness when facing a challenging situation?

30. What can I do to remain focused in a challenging situation?

31. How much personal time do I need each week to function well and feel good?

32. What are limiting beliefs that impact my life negatively? What is the source of each belief? What positive beliefs would counteract those beliefs?

33 How much do I trust myself? Do I listen to others more than myself? 

34. How do I feel about accepting my shortcomings? Am I able to accept my whole self?

35. What is the basis of my self acceptance? Is it based on accomplishment or upon the validation of others?

36. Do I wait for others to solve my problems? Why?

38. From whom do I get advice when troubled? Why?

38. Do I have any regret about life? What do I need to do to stop living with regret?

39. How did I feel about my last mistake and what lesson did I learn from it?

40. If I could start my life again, what would I live without?

Why do you need to practise these self-reflection exercises?

Taking your time to practise these self-reflection exercises will help you in these ways:

• discovering your strength and weakness.

• knowing how you can live a fulfilled life.

• building your confidence and competence.

• overcoming your challenges and worries.

• improving your relationship with yourself and    others.

• learning to make sound decision.

• revealing your faults and their corrections.

• communicating more clearly and purposefully.

• tracking your personal progress and growth.

• remaining true to yourself.

Case study 

1. FT finds it difficult to cope with his studies. This has made him to conclude that he is useless because his peers are mocking him. Is FT truly useless? What can FT do to evaluate his conclusion? How can practising self-reflection exercises be of help to him?

2. Serah does not feel fulfilled at work, thereby making her performance to be poor. Her manager is already complaining about her. This has become a challenge for her as she could lose her job. How can Serah know what makes her feel unfulfilled at work? Can she overcome the challenge? As her manager, how can you help her perform better?

3. GB is part of a team of five personnels, who are to work on a project to be undertaken by the company. She is offered to be the team lead, but she rejects the offer claiming that she lacks team leadership and team management skills. Is her decision right? If she had accepted the offer, how will it affect the project?

4. UVW LTD is finding it hard to achieve its goals. MT, a management consultant, advises the company to make time for reflecting on things it does and how well it does those things with respect to its goals. And keep a journal for recording and comparing the actual result and planned result. Do you think this can help UVW LTD to discover its problem? How will this impact the performance of the company if it follows the advice?

Disclaimer: All names used are for illustration purpose.

Do you find this challenge to be helpful? Share with your friends and family. It might be helpful to them as well.